Chapter 10: Fertility

Over the first few days after the appointment, I go through the packet of information marking the important parts and, after some coaxing from parent, I decided to call the fertility clinic about sperm preservation.

This is my experience with them. Your mileage may vary.

Nov 15, I call the number and schedule an appointment, they were booking months out but I agreed anyway. I paid the required $50 fee and set the appointment for March 9.

So, why did I have to schedule an initial consultation 6 months out when it wasn't even a 5 min phone call that asked 10 questions that could've been on a form. After asking questions like, what is your height and weight, and what medications are you taking, they ask

CNY: so how can I help you?

Me: Like uhh, I was looking into freezing my sperm.

CNY: Ok that is something we do, just call the closest office, whenever you're ready, to schedule a time for deposit. I will let them know you're interested.

Me: Ok I'm not sure what the point of this was then.

CNY: This was just to put you in our system and make you one of our patients.

...and that was basically it. (Call length: 5m 6s)

Like what was the point of that. A litteral 5 min phone call to say "ok, now call the local branch to setup the actual appointment." They charged me $50 for a 5 min "consultation" that was just saying "ok now you're a patient and you can book an actual visit."

After that call I figure out my schedule and call them back to book an appointment. I call the local branch (Turns out it doesn't matter what number you dial, they all lead to the same phone tree.) but, I wasn't sure which number to push. The closest options were option 1 (for new consults and doctors), and option 4 (to speak with a member in the donor team). I try option 1 and sit on hold 9 min and then it hangs up on me. I try a second time, also trying option 4 just in case, but that option only leads to the options for egg donors and egg recipients, so, I have to end that call and try again, for a 3rd time. This time I press option 1 again, but I actually get to a person this time.

They offer me the next day for an appointment (too soon), so I book one out for my next day off, St Patrick's day. Then they ask, "will you be collecting the deposit at home or here in the office?" Uh, I had not thought about that. Me: "In office I guess."

I spend the next week getting ready for something that I have never done before. There was no information given. I guess I could have asked more questions, but I wasn't even sure what all to ask. What is provided? What all do I need to bring? What all should I bring? I went to the website to see what is listed but it wasn't telling me enough about what the process is.

So I find the place, walk in and check in at the desk, they ask your name, birthdate, and confirm your address, etc., and you have a seat. The waiting room felt more like a living room, it was kinda upscale looking and on the smaller side (the 16 or so people filled most of the available seating), but the queue of people moved quickly so it never felt like a normal crowded hospital waiting room.

After a time, your called up, put in a room, confirm your Name, D.O.B., given a cup, told to write the collection time on and bring to the desk when done.

The room is a small, but cozy (there is enough room for two if desired), with a dimmable light, a comfy chair, and a computer with internet access for looking up whatever needed to help "get the job done". The computer does have a couple adult sites bookmarked but, also, there is an address bar, and Google is the home page, so you can bring up whatever you want/need. Also provided is tissues and hand sanitizer. There is also free WiFi and I noted a couple extra outlets in the room should you need to ... charge your phone.

The room felt clean and safe to do whatever needed in. I would have to assume that the rooms are sanitized between users as well. I did my necessary and turned in the cup. They said I was all set and to have a good day. That was it, I was done.

I assume they will be testing the sperm to check if it's viable. Once that is complete, I'll pay $100, which will include the first year of storage free. Every year past that is $450.